SARCASM FOR DUMBNESS WILL MAKE THE WORLD A BETTER PLACE TO LIVE

New place, new people, new experiences, new life, new bla bla bla; now wait… there’s something more waiting for you… it’s a cannon… and I call it ‘cannon of dumb questions’, and yes you need to answer them, coz shooting people for their dumbness is still a crime. And as it’s said ‘eye for an eye will make the whole world blind’ similarly ‘sarcasm for dumbness will make the world a better place to live’ (latter was not said by Gandhi of course).

Recently I shifted to a new place and then followed the mighty cannon of dumb questions. Since I am from Lucknow here are the few questions that totally push you to reply sarcastically;

1.  So you from the city of ‘tameez and tehzeeb’?

Yes, instead of polio drops we have Do boond tameez aur tehzeeb ke. Next time you pay a visit to this city just try overtaking a teenager and you’ll get a pocket dictionary of abuses complimentary.

2.  You are from City Montessori School; you must know this guy/girl?

Hey, this school literally has the world record of most Number of pupils. It’s like 90 times the population of Vatican City. Sure I know everyone of them, and I ‘am also batman.

3.  Are the nawabs still ruling your city?

(Someone actually asked this question, and no she wasn’t a blonde)

Good morning Rip Van Winkle, its 2014, we are a free country now.

4.  Do you people put ‘Aap’ before every phrase?

Yes we do, take for example ‘Aap chutiye hain’, see we have a natural and unique talent of making a phrase respectful and insulting at the same time.

(P.S. Mr. Kejriwal this is not about your party, and surely ‘isme BJP aur cong. Ka koi haath nahi hai’ _/\_)

5. Has Mayawati actually built her statues in Lucknow?

Yes, the lady is obsessed with selfies, deal with it; but hey who isn’t it’s trending these days. The only difference is her selfies cost crores of tax payers money, big deal. Who cares about mango people.

Go home, enough sarcasm and dumbness for the day.